Foiling The Finicky Eater
by Mary B. O'Brien
Seven
Tips for
Harried Parents
Remember the research study that
assured us that children would, if given freedom to select their own foods, choose a
balanced diet of healthy choices?
The researchers obviously didn't
test my daughter -- nor any of her young friends. I know for certain that if they -- and
most other kids in the world, I suspect, were placed before a smorgasbord of fresh
veggies, nourishing fruits, whole grains and fudge cake, they would choose the cake every
time.
Butterscotch sundaes in the
running with carrot sticks? Chocolate-iced brownies vs. creamed corn? Get real!
Kids have their own definite
ideas when it comes to food. Parents have theirs. When the two don't agree, "food
fights" erupt: disagreements, power struggles, and unpleasant scenes over kids'
eating.
Unfortunately, these day-to-day
problems can sometimes turn into lifelong hang-ups. How many adults still feel guilty if
we don't clean our plates at the dinner table? (We have the extra 15 pounds around our
midriffs to show for it, too!) Well into middle age, we can still hear our parents'
well-intentioned voices telling us to eat the crust, don't waste food, always eat a hearty
breakfast.
The good news is that most
"food fights" can be avoided with a little careful parenting and a stretch of
our patience and flexibility. That's not to say that a balanced diet and good nutrition
aren't important. To the contrary, they affect everything from bone growth to
concentration in school. It's critical that growing kids get the nutrients their bodies
need. But there are many ways to accomplish this. These seven tips can help you cope with
your finicky eater.
Be patient. If your child is going through a "I hate
vegetables" phase, remember, it's just a phase. Insisting that a youngster eat a big
pile of peas right now might do more lasting harm than good. Chances are that next year,
peas -- or something with similar nutritional value -- will be back in favor. In the
meantime, find alternatives -- and a good vitamin supplement.
Serve the healthy
foods they like. Maybe this isn't the
time to bring on the anchovy-spinachy quiche or the sautéed oysters in chutney sauce.
Stick to the old favorites. With all the new options for convenient, low-fat foods, it's
easier than ever to provide well-liked, healthy meals that kids will actually eat.
Be creative. If your child decides she hates milk, make sure she gets
her full dose of calcium some other way. Calcium-enriched juices and cheese sticks are
kid-friendly, and milk can be easily disguised in soups, hot chocolate and shakes.
Be flexible, but don't
cave in. There's a difference between
letting a child's food whims rule the roost at mealtime, and being lovingly flexible. Make
the distinction.
For example, in one family, Mom makes dinner for the entire family, but will not
fix special orders for a picky eater. (She does, however, avoid serving foods that are
high on someone's "I can't stand it" list.) If an occasional entree is
highly disagreeable to a child, he is allowed to sample two bites and then quietly make a
peanut-butter sandwich instead. This avoids the harried-cook syndrome, where Mom or Dad is
making a hamburger for one child, fish sticks for another, pizza for the third and grilled
cheese for the fourth.
Learn more about
nutrition and good eating habits. The
cut-and-dried advice many of us grew up with is more flexible now. A child who doesn't eat
three balanced meals can sometimes be tempted with six smaller meals, or two good meals
and a well-rounded bedtime snack. And the old-fashioned conviction that it is necessary to
serve meat every evening has given way to the practice of serving frequent vegetarian or
whole grain main dishes.
Last, don't forbid
treats, which can create a child who
binges on sugar when you are not around. Never use food as a reward or punishment, which
risks causing food-related emotional problems later in life.
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